Do I still believe that the secret to happiness is low expectations?
Expectations vs. Presence
I used to believe that the key to happiness was low expectations. Maybe I still do. Our quote this week by Björk really has me pondering the relationship between being present, having expectations and gratitude. She is basically saying that when she is present and grateful for what shows up she is not expecting anything and so therefore she is not disappointed.
I used to keep my expectations low so I wouldn't be disappointed but now through my gratitude work I find that I have both higher expectations (because I always expect gratitude) and higher acceptance of whatever shows up. The interesting thing is that even having low expectations you can still be disappointed because you do still have expectations. The main difference in my way of life now as well as the Björk quote is that the expectations we do have is our own choice. Expecting presence and gratitude is our choice. It really has nothing to do with what shows up in our lives or what other people do. It is saying that regardless of what is happening we can stay in the moment and be grateful. And even as we accept what shows up in our lives we also acknowledge our choice in both attitude and action.
So I don't really believe the key to happiness is low expectations. Now I believe the key to happiness is choosing gratitude. I have pretty high expectations of people in my life. Of how they treat me. Of how I honor my worth. And when those expectations aren't met I don't just wallow in it. I choose to accept it or I choose to act to make a change. And through it all, every step of the way, my gratitude is there with me.
I’m not saying I can always do this, but if I can stay more in the moment and be grateful for every step of the way, then because I’m not expecting anything, nothing was ever abandoned.
~Björk
What are you grateful for at this step in your journey?
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[su_note note_color=”#e7e7e7″ text_color=”#686767″ radius=”0″] My gratitude journey started in May 2011 and continues to this day. Thank you for being a part of it! A daily gratitude practice is simple. Write down three things you are grateful for each day. Download your free GratitudeGuide. My clients focus on gratitude and learn from their successes to make the positive changes they want in their lives. You can too. Call me to set up our first meeting 505.333.9336. [/su_note]