Bell Hooks calls it absolutely disenabling
Negativity Stops Me in My Tracks
I am currently reading All About Love by Bell Hooks where I came across a wonderful passage exploring negativity, positivity and taking responsibility.
Because we have learned to believe negativity is more realistic, it appears more real than any positive voice. Once we begin to replace negative thinking with positive thinking, it becomes utterly clear that, far from being realistic, negative thinking is absolutely disenabling.
~Bell Hooks
I have found this quote to be true. We believe that negativity is more realistic and so it appears more real. It is through practicing gratitude that negativity and realism have diverged for me. I used to think of negativity as realistic, as seeing the world for what it is. But that is not how I see it now after years of practicing gratitude. Now I see that so much of what is real and what is possible depend on perspective. And negativity and positivity are perspectives.
What is more important to me is being able to really notice. To see things and situations. To experience the reality of all of it. And to experience the reality of our emotions and other people’s emotions. And to have the power to move forward and act. And for me, negativity is a stopping perspective while positivity is an action perspective. So if you find yourself stuck in inaction your realism may have taken a turn into negativity.
I like to think of mindfulness as the awareness of reality and then we can choose the story we will tell about that reality based on our perspective. And I would rather choose a perspective that is empowering and that opens up possibilities. And for me, that perspective is one of gratitude.
It reminds me of a an experience I had in Oregon a few years back. I was sitting on a log next to a stream taking photos and enjoying the beautiful mossy view. A few other people walked up and sat next to us so I decided to leave and find a more private area. When I got to the next spot I realized I didn’t have my camera. I went back to that log and no one was around and my camera wasn’t there either. I immediately thought that the people had to have taken it because I left it on the log in plain sight.
I sunk into negativity telling a story about how you can’t trust people as I started walking away. Then I thought maybe that wasn’t true. Maybe the camera fell into the water or something. So I walked over to the log and was looking into the water trying to find it when I spotted it hidden underneath the log. Just out of view and far enough from the water to be protected.
What I love about this story is that if I didn’t open up to other possibilities I would have just accepted my negativity and I would have never found it. I would have thought that my negativity was reality but it wasn’t. The reality was: my camera was on the log before we moved, there were other people sitting there, and the camera wasn’t on top of the log when I returned. I still don’t know when the camera fell. But thanks to thinking of other possibilities I moved out of the negativity that stopped me from looking further.
This ability to shift my perspective and to be open to possibilities are some of the ways that my gratitude practice serves me in unexpected ways. In what ways does practicing gratitude serve you?
Just think of any negativity that comes at you as a raindrop falling into the ocean of your bliss.
~Maharishi Mahesh Yogi
In what ways does practicing gratitude serve you?
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[su_note note_color=”#e7e7e7″ text_color=”#686767″ radius=”0″] My gratitude journey started in May 2011 and continues to this day. Thank you for being a part of it! A daily gratitude practice is simple. Write down three things you are grateful for each day. Download your free GratitudeGuide. My clients focus on gratitude and learn from their successes to make the positive changes they want in their lives. You can too. Call me to set up our first meeting 505.333.9336. [/su_note]